Real Moxie

Wikileaks lessons

2010-12-07T22:39:00.000-08:00

Here is what I have learned from the Julian Assange saga:

Never date a woman who works as a university "gender equity officer".
Always use a condom in Sweden.
If the CIA is out to get you, avoid any women who might have CIA connections.
If you date two women at the same time, make sure that they never talk to each other.

When to ask for a date

2008-12-16T13:00:00.000-08:00

Ever try to figure out why a women rejected your advances? Forget it. You will never learn the reasons, and if you did, they would make no sense to you. But here is some news you can use:

Women off the pill accepted offers twice as often as women on the pill (5.8% as opposed to 12%), perhaps a reflection of the likelihood that women on the pill are more likely to have men in their lives than women not taking birth control.

A more interesting trend emerged when Guéguen analysed the data according to a women's fertility. Among women off the pill, those in their fertile phase accepted 21.7% of advances, while women in the midst of their periods gave out their numbers to just 7.8 % of men, a significant statistical difference that did not exist for women on the pill.

So if you get rejected, figure that she may be on her period, and try again two weeks later.

Training for competition

2008-05-02T11:00:00.000-07:00

I went on a running date with a dame who sometimes competes in marathons and other races. I told her that I was thinking of signing up for an upcoming local triathlon, butn I checked out the competition, and I have much greater chances of finishing in the top 20 in an upcoming hot dog eating contest. I said that I have a natural talent for gluttony, and and I can out-eat everyone I know.

I had eaten the biggest burrito I had ever seen. It slowed down my running, but it was good training for the eating contest. It would be hard to train for both the eating contest and the triathlon, and I was thinking that my talents were better directed at the eating contest.

She was not impressed.

Oriental women prefer white men

2007-11-09T02:52:00.000-08:00

Here is some dating research:

We found no evidence of the stereotype of a white male preference for East Asian women. However, we also found that East Asian women did not discriminate against white men (only against black and Hispanic men). As a result, the white man-Asian woman pairing was the most common form of interracial dating—but because of the women's neutrality, not the men's pronounced preference.

This is consistent with my experience. Women are much choosier than men, and it is the oriental women who have a preference for white men.

Scientists study dating preferences

2007-09-04T17:16:00.000-07:00

This research got a lot of publicity:

Men's choices did not reflect their stated preferences, the researchers concluded. Instead, men appeared to base their decisions mostly on the women's physical attractiveness.

The men also appeared to be much less choosy. Men tended to select nearly every woman above a certain minimum attractiveness threshold, Todd said.

Women's actual choices, like men's, did not reflect their stated preferences, but they made more discriminating choices, the researchers found.

The scientists said women were aware of the importance of their own attractiveness to men, and adjusted their expectations to select the more desirable guys.

All of this should have been too obvious to be news. The stated preferences of women may have little to do with their actual preferences, and women are harder to predict. My theory is that men divide women into two groups -- those who are sufficiently attractive to stimulate sexual arousal, and those who are not. Men only want to date women in the first group. Beyond that, men are subject to the much greater choosiness of women.

Thirsty females

2007-06-06T22:38:00.000-07:00

Research news:

Martin Edvardsson at Uppsala University, Sweden, tested the idea that females tap into this by keeping them on dry beans with or without access to water. Females living on beans alone accepted more matings, presumably to secure the water in the seminal fluid (Animal Behaviour, DOI: 10.1016/j.anbehav.2006.07.018).

Edvardsson says that the energy used to produce the ejaculate, which makes up a whopping 10 per cent of a male's weight, is well spent. Once impregnated, females lose interest in sex - probably to avoid further injury from the male's spiny penis. They are more likely to mate again if they are thirsty.

He is talking about bean weevil beetles. No word on applicability to other species.

Difficulties for rich handsome men

2007-04-23T13:24:00.000-07:00

New research:

A rich, good-looking man seeking a wife might do well to play down his wealth. That's the implication of a study by John Lycett and colleagues suggesting that some women are wary of men who are both attractive and wealthy. ...

The female students were asked to rate the men for their attractiveness as long-term partners. Overall, the better looking men were rated as more attractive, as were those men with higher status.

Crucially, however, there was an interaction between facial attractiveness and status, such that good-looking men with high status were actually rated as less attractive than good-looking men of medium status. The researchers said this reflected the female strategy of avoiding men who are more likely to be unfaithful in the future.

So that's why I haven't been able to get a date! Women perceive me as so rich and so handsome that I could never stay faithful. I would be overwhelmed by all the other women trying to seduce me.

Advice from an ex

2006-11-05T14:42:00.000-08:00

A woman whom I dated for a couple of months early this year just contacted me to tell me all the things that she had done for me. Among other things, she said that she researched Alzheimers disease for me, and rescued me from what could have been a bad diagnosis!

It seems that someone made a wisecrack about smoking dope to treat Alzheimers, and she remembered noticing how my eyes were dilated on our first date. Furthermore, she was surprised when I told her that I didn't get a second medical opinion when I broke my leg last year. So she figured that I had gotten a faulty Alzheimers diagnosis and she was encouraging me to get a second opinion. She found a couple of articles saying that Alzheimers can only be reliably diagnosed by an autopsy.

Then she wanted credit for warning me about how other women might take advantage of me. There are a lot of loose women out there, she said, and some of them will just use me for sex. Okay, thanks for the warning.

Update: She reads this blog and she complains that she feels like I minimized our relationship, and poked fun of what she had to say. She also says that I misrepresented things so badly that now she thinks that maybe I do have Alzheimers!

In love with a cat

2006-10-05T23:19:00.000-07:00

The NY Times reports:

Ms. Chytrowsky, who says she is normally quite allergic, had no symptoms even though she allowed Joshua to sleep in her bed. "I fell in love with him," she said. "He is a real stud — well, he is a stud, really."

Joshua is a cat. This is a science story.

Make sure it lasts 20 seconds

2006-08-16T13:25:00.000-07:00

SF paper reports:

For all women -- and those who love them -- she offers a tip.

Research shows that the female brain naturally releases oxytocin after a 20-second hug. The embrace bonds the huggers and triggers the brain's trust circuits. So Brizendine advises, don't let a guy hug you unless you plan to trust him.

"And if you do," she said, "make sure it lasts 20 seconds."

A few neurological differences between women and men from Louann Brizendine's "The Female Brain":

Thoughts about sex enter women's brains once every couple of days; for men, thoughts about sex occur every minute.

Women use 20,000 words per day; men use 7,000 per day.

Women excel at knowing what people are feeling; men have difficulty spotting an emotion unless someone cries or threatens bodily harm.

Women remember fights that a man insists never happened.

Women over 50 are more likely to initiate divorce.

I went on several dates with a woman, and I think that it was a mistake to hug her for 20 seconds. Now she trusts me way too much!

On the last date, I was making out with her when her cat demanded to get fed. I said, "the cat can wait". She then launched into a tirade about how I was a control freak.

The odd thing is that she is one of the more controlling women I have ever dated. Just on that date, she had told me when to show up, what to do, where to sit, how to groom myself, what to eat, and what possessions to sell. I was passively cooperating, but it is now clear that there is no way to please her anyway.

How feminism destroyed real men

2006-08-07T22:59:00.000-07:00

UK newspaper essay:

The truth is, a real man doesn't care what any woman thinks of him. He doesn't care what anyone thinks of him: he answers solely to his spirit.

Real men don't pretend or even try to understand women. They simply love them for being the mysterious, capricious creatures that they are. And they don't take them too seriously, either. They know the vicissitudes of the female mind, its constant insecurities and the fluctuations in mood.

Rather than pander to them, they simply watch them drift by like so many clouds on the horizon. They don't get entangled in a woman's feelings and listen to her prattling on and on until she's talked herself out. Such strong and stoic men are exactly what women need to anchor themselves amid the chaos of their emotions. ...

My wife is older and more successful than I am, but the bedroom has always been the arena in which I have brought her down to earth.

The female orgasm is the natural mechanism by which men assert dominion over women: a man who appreciates this can negotiate whatever difficulties arise in his relationships with them. ...

I don't believe in working on relationships and making artificial efforts to give them substance. I believe in people being themselves and following their hearts towards whatever destiny lies before them.

The article is funny. I wonder what his wife says.

Update: A reader claims that his wife is Liz Jones, and her story is here. It may be more than you want to know.

Hot or not

2006-08-01T17:13:00.000-07:00

Cast your vote here:

Hi, I live in the Santa Cruz mountains. I like my job, adventures, kids, and intelligent women. I have a PhD in Math and I can discuss many other subjects. I am fit, educated, healthy, addiction-free, sane, divorced, debt-free, and available.

Tuna sandwich, no tuna

2006-06-02T19:46:00.000-07:00

I just went out on a date with a psychotherapist. At the end of the date, she said that I needed work, and suggested counseling. She said that I was particular hard on the waiter.

She would not say that I was "crazy", and she denies that there are any crazy people.

Here is what happened. We went on a walk, and then stopped at a local vegetarian student hangout for some food. The diner was her choice, as she was dying to eat some of their corn dogs. The menu described meatless meatballs and fake bacon BLT sandwiches. I don't know what was in the corn dogs.

I wanted to order the tuna sandwich, but I first asked the waiter whether there was any tuna fish in the tuna sandwich. He said that the diner was under new management, and the tuna sandwich no longer has tuna in it. As I write this, it sounds like the waiter was pulling my leg, but this was just the sort of restaurant where a tuna sandwich might not have tuna, and the waiter seemed quite sincere when he told us that the tuna sandwich was much better when it had tuna in it.

At most restaurants, it would be obnoxious to ask a waiter if the tuna sandwich has tuna fish in it. If the waiter had said, "Yes, of course, that is what the menu says", then I probably would have admitted that I asked a stupid question. But it turned out to be a legitimate question.

It was Jack Nicholson in the 1970 movie Five Easy Pieces who famously told an annoying waitress that he wanted a tuna sandwich with no tuna. I am afraid that my date thought that I was some crazy guy like Jack Nicholson. Except that she doesn't think that anyone is crazy, so I am just someone who needs counseling.

Slave contract

2006-05-02T00:22:00.000-07:00

I just stumbled across this:

A kinky "slavery contract" may play a central role in a messy divorce case involving a Wisconsin businessman and his estranged wife, who allegedly agreed to the bizarre pact several years before their 2005 marriage. The six-page unsigned pact, a copy of which you'll find below, spells out explicit rules for the relationship between "Master" Kevin Anderson and "slave" Kimberly O'Brien.

I never heard of this. It appears to be just harmless role playing. Other slave contracts may be found here.

No one pretends that these have any legal effect. In this divorce case, it was signed well before the marriage, so I don't know what it would prove except that they were both into role playing.

Single mom rant

2006-04-02T14:16:00.000-07:00

This rant by Lori Gottlieb on NPR is funny.

Tips for married men

2006-02-18T19:32:00.000-08:00

Scott Haltzman's "The Secrets of Happily Married Men" has these tips:

Tell your wife you adore her.
Suggest an activity that's fun.
Do your share of child care.
Do your part with chores.
Listen without judging.
Praise her.
Support her interests.
Say, "I understand," when she expresses her emotions.

The standard advice for bungling husbands is to go with their wives to a marriage counselor, but Haltzman disagrees. He's a marriage counselor who advises men to beware of marriage counseling. While other therapists urge men to get in touch with their feelings and empathize with their wives', Haltzman figures this is a losing game because their brains aren't wired for it.

They can't express their emotions or empathize as well as women can. Telling a man to solve his marital problems by talking about his emotions for an hour is like telling a woman to solve her problems at the office by joining the guys for a weekend game of paintball.

I am not sure about his reasoning, but I do have the impression that marriage counselors do more harm than good.

Dog bite

2006-01-23T23:33:00.000-08:00

I was bitten by a dog in the neighborhood. It had barked at me and chased me a few times before, but it never came close to biting. It drew blood in about a dozen points. Ouch.

I called Animal Control. They are supposed to check the dog for rabies.

Local earthquake

2006-01-05T08:54:00.000-08:00

An 3.14 (Richter scale) earthquake woke me up at 6:05 this morning. The epicenter of the quake was just a couple of miles from my house, and I felt a good shake. It was just enough to remind me of the great 7.1 quake of 1989.

My hair secret

2005-12-15T08:49:00.000-08:00

A woman on a date complimented me on my hair a couple of times. She appeared to like my haircut, as well as the way it was combed. I told her my secret. I let an 8-year-old girl cut my hair, and I only comb it about once a week.

"So you just don't care how you look?", she asked.

Yes, I do care. I am very vain. I used to goto hair stylists and to blow-dry my hair every day, but no one ever complimented me on my hair. Now I've discovered the formula for impressing women. An 8-year-old girl has a better sense of how hair should look than I do. I just put her in charge of my hair, and I get more compliments than I ever did before.

I don't know why my date asked me if I don't care. If she thought that my hair looked good, then why wouldn't she give me credit for how I look? Next time, I will keep my secret to myself.

Actually, I am just lazy. I drive a convertible. No matter how I comb it, the wind blows it out of place. I got tired of combing my hair every time I get out of the car. And home haircuts are a lot more convenient than going to a barber.

Defining character

2005-12-11T17:39:00.000-08:00

I just went out on a date with a dame I met on the internet. She was very cautious; she wouldn't even tell me her name. (She did tell me enough info that I could track her down if I really wanted to.)

Her main requirement for me to go out with her was that I could define the word "character". She said that no one pays attention to character anymore, and that she is looking for a man of character.

Fortunately, I had an online dictionary handy, and I slyly looked it up while I was talking to her. I smoothly said that a character is a written symbol that is used to represent speech, as in "the Greek alphabet has 24 characters". She said, "That's not what I am talking about."

I immediately followed up with saying that a character is an imaginary person represented in a work of fiction, as in "she is the main character in the novel". But then I blew it by asking why she wants to date an imaginary person. She sounded frustrated, but apparently her other internet prospects could not even give an inappropriate definition. I had just barely passed the test.

It turns out that the most looked-up word in my online dictionary is integrit y. All the other words in the top ten have some obvious explanation based on news stories in the last year, such as tsunami, pandemic, and levee. But no one can figure out what "integrity" is doing on the list.

My theory is that there are a lot of women out there on the internet who are looking for a man of integrity. And there are a lot of men like me who have to look it up.

She almost canceled the night before. She said that she had nightmares about me being a crazy drug addict. Her fears seem to have been prompted by me telling her that I like music from The Doors. She insisted on moving the time of the date earlier so that she could inspect me in plain daylight.

It turned out that she was an amateur psychologist, and she figured that she could decide for herself whether I was a crazy drug addict. She noticed my dilated pupils at the restaurant right away, and became alarmed. Somehow she got the idea that I might have been forcibly committed to a mental asylum.

I walked her to her car after dinner, and she was still cautious. "This could be a dangerous neighborhood", she said. I replied, "Lady, I am carrying a hockey stick. No one is going to mess with us." I considered telling her that I had a gun in my hip pocket for backup, but I don't think that would have helped.

The next day she sent me a nice email apologizing for giving me a thorough interrogation about my psychiatric history. She said that she consulted with her mom about it, and her mom said that those questions should have waited until the second date.

She said that she had to ask me on the first date because she fully intended to ditch me at the end of the date. However, she said that I was much nicer than she expected. She said that she liked me so much that she told her mom that I was a "work in progress". I guess that is her way of saying that she will go out on a second date with me.

Maybe not. Her biggest fear was not that I'd be a crazy drug addict, but that I would write her up on the internet. She is very fussy about her privacy. I had to promise that I wouldn't do that. She would not give permission for this post. I just had to do it, and hope that she is not too offended. I tried not to identify her. I don't even know her name myself! I'll send her an email about it, and take it down if she objects. My guess is that even if her mom reads this post, she won't even recognize her daughter because she got a completely different description of the date.

Triathlon mating rituals

2005-12-04T18:31:00.000-08:00

The NY Times says:

The passion for adventure sports has even changed mating rituals in the region. "It's hard to go on a date in San Francisco and not go on a date with a girl who has not been in five triathlons," said Auren Hoffman, 31, the chairman of Stonebrick, a high-tech consulting company. "That means that people go to bed early because they wake up at 7 a.m. to go on their run or their ride. The whole social scene changes because of sports."

I once dated a feminist who was strangely offended when I told her that I was training for a triathlon. She kept pestering me as to why I would do such a thing. Finally, I told her that I do it because it is macho. Then she really flipped. She didn't think that anyone should do anything macho, and was too upset to say any more.

About 15 minutes later, she returned to the subject, and asked if any women did triathlons. I told her that yes, about a third of the contestants would be woman. She was tremendously relieved by this. I don't know why.

The Game

2005-11-30T23:48:00.000-08:00

A friend of mine lent me The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists.

The book is bound to look like a Bible, as if it is the definitive guide to picking up women. It isn't. But it is an entertaining and popular-selling collection of stories about how the author (Neil Strauss) became a guru on the subject.

There isn't really any secret society, or even any secrets. You can find similar info in the self-help section of your bookstore, or in seminars, or on the internet for free. If you are interested, you can start at this site. Here are some of the main ideas:

Confidence. You need confidence to approach and date attractive women, and they like men who know what they are doing. With practice, you can acquire the confidence.

Numbers. If you approach a lot of women, then your chances of finding mutual attraction are vastly improved.

Avoiding being a chump. Frequently a man get fixated on some woman, and expend a lot of energy trying to figure out why she is rejecting him. He may never figure it out. The books say to just forget her and move on.

Learning to flirt. There are a lot of flirting tips. The experts suggest everything from corny lines and jokes to magic tricks. You can tell stories, make conversation, or entertain the women any way you can. If she likes you, then she may go out on a date with you. Besides learning how to indicate interest in a woman, it is also important to read her signals so you can assess how interested she is in you.

Advanced techniques. Some experts promote NLP and other techniques. One of the ideas is that people often communicate their feelings in very subtle ways. These things seem to come naturally to some people. I suppose that they can be learned as well. I am not sure whether there is really much payoff to these methods.

One counter-intuitive tip is playing hard-to-get. I don't know whether women learn to play hard-to-get from their parents, friends, magazines, or what, but they all seem to know how to do it. Men don't. Apparently playing hard-to-get works for women and men. It is a little tricky, as you can also lose dates that way.

The book is amusing. Maybe I'll get some dating tips.

Introvert brains

2005-11-29T00:16:00.000-08:00

Introverts use their brains more:

Introverted children enjoy the internal world of thoughts, feelings and fantasies, and there's a physiological reason for this. Researchers using brain scans have found introverts have more brain activity in general, and specifically in the frontal lobes. When these areas are activated, introverts are energized by retrieving long-term memories, problem solving, introspection, complex thinking and planning.

Marti Olsen Laney will soon have a book on introverted kids.

Illusions

2005-11-27T21:50:00.000-08:00

Here are optical Illusions and Paradoxes. For geeks, I also recommend How To Write Unmaintainable Code and World's Worst Website.

Clint Eastwood movie clip

2005-11-15T18:26:00.000-08:00

Sidney Crosby in action

2005-11-14T17:37:00.000-08:00

This picture is amazing. Normally a hockey player doesn't get thru like that.

Low latent inhibition

2005-11-03T11:39:00.000-08:00

I just saw a (fictional) TV show that talked about a wacky psychological condition called low latent inhibition, and how it can affect people with high IQ. I thought that it was gobbledegook, but actually there is similar research. Weird.

Animal experiments in the 1950s led to this:

In the latent inhibition (LI) paradigm, nonreinforced preexposure to a stimulus retards subsequent conditioning to that stimulus.

This means that if you observe something and decide that it is not important, then you tend to ignore it the next time you see it. But high IQ folks may not ignore it:

"This means that creative individuals remain in contact with the extra information constantly streaming in from the environment," says co-author and U of T psychology professor Jordan Peterson. "The normal person classifies an object, and then forgets about it, even though that object is much more complex and interesting than he or she thinks. The creative person, by contrast, is always open to new possibilities."

On the TV show, the guy with the low latent inhibition had the floor plans to his prison tattooed on his body so that he could devise an escape.

Word is virago

2005-10-26T19:45:00.000-07:00

The word of the day is virago:

1. A woman of extraordinary stature, strength, and courage.
2. A woman regarded as loud, scolding, ill-tempered, quarrelsome, or overbearing.

Funny. It makes a little more sense when you read the Latin root.

Disappearing pink dots

2005-10-22T15:07:00.000-07:00

Stare at this illusion until the pink dots disappear. It is amazing.

Science photos

2005-10-22T14:44:00.000-07:00

award-winning science photos.

Andromeda Galaxy

2005-10-17T17:11:00.000-07:00

Here are some amazing infrared pictures of the Andromeda galaxy. The galaxy is on a collision course with our galaxy.

Letter about math majors

2005-10-15T12:29:00.000-07:00

Water bridge

2005-10-15T10:48:00.000-07:00

This picture of a water bridge is amazing. I had no idea barge traffic could be carried on a bridge over another river.

Running over with a Mercedes

2005-09-21T21:27:00.000-07:00

I just went on a blind date with a woman. She seemed nice, except when brought up the story of Clara Harris who was convicted of running over and killing her husband with a Mercedes a couple of years ago.

My date said that she would not have been able to serve on the jury at the trial. She said that she felt like running over her husband when he ditched her for a much younger girlfriend, and she could understand backing up and running over him repeatedly. She said that the therapist assured her that the affair would not last, and the therapist was right, but she still couldn't vote to convict Clara Harris.

Why was she telling me this? Was she trying to alienate me?!

Actually, she appeared to have a quite good relationship with her ex-husband, and they cooperate very well in the rearing of their two kids. I am always impressed when people are able to get along with their ex-spouses.

New lesbian chic

2005-09-16T09:54:00.000-07:00

A Phoenix story on a new trend:

Sincero didn't think she was a lesbian. A former punk rocker with a little-noticed novel under her belt, she was in her late 30s. She'd always liked men. She still did. And yet there she was: "All of a sudden, I found myself with an incredible woman who got it and me, and the sex was hot as hell," she'd later write. "And before I knew it I was in a relationship."

There weren't any books on that.

So she wrote one herself.

Sincero used to be an advertising copywriter, so the title was the easy part: The Straight Girl's Guide to Sleeping With Chicks. Solely on the strength of its catchiness, she sold the book to Simon & Schuster. She had yet to write even the opening sentence.

But write it she did, and fortunately for Sincero, the finished book tapped an Important Generational Trend. ...

The Straight Girl's Guide made it to number 7 on the Los Angeles Times best-seller list. Sincero's Web site started getting 8,500 hits a day. And Sincero began teaching workshops to girls who want to learn more, including one next week at Phoenix's MADE Art Boutique. The workshops almost always sell out.

We've had them here at the local university for a few years. Some people call them Lesbians Until Graduation (LUG).

A new government survey says:

About 4 percent of men and women described themselves as homosexual or bisexual, but in a finding that surprised the researchers, 14 percent of the women aged 18 to 29 reported at least one homosexual experience, more than twice the proportion for young men.

It also reported high oral sex figures for young people. The study is available at cdc.gov.

Knocked-up slut seeks Mr. Right

2005-09-09T12:01:00.000-07:00

I found this local personal ad:

beautiful girl seeking a real man - 23 (santa cruz)
Date: 2005-09-07, 9:04PM PDT

Hi
I'm looking for a nice honest intelligent stable and funny guy to get to know and possibley settle down with. That;'s pretty much standard right? but for me it has been hard to come by in this town. I am 23 years old. I am collge educated and have a job working with a disabled child. I am a deep thinker, i am emotional, commpasionate, shy but very silly and cute, love to dance, am into finding meaning and peace in life and much more. I had my share of wild partying in my younger days but have settled dowm a bit. I still wenjoy dancing and going out on the town occasionally but am no longer such a wild child. I want someone whom I can trust, who makes me feel loved and safe, someone who I can snuggle up on the couvh and kiss and watch a good movie with. As for my looks, I am blonde, petite, have a few freckles on my face and have hazel eyes. I'm pretty cute. And something important you should also know about me is that I am currently pregnant (5 months) but I am completely single. I know this fact will scare away a good majoprity of potential dates but maybe there are a few guys out there who won't mind. Well, contact me if you are interested and I will send you a pic.

This is sad. This is a college educated girl, and she thinks that she is just asking for what is "standard". Her feminist teachers have told her that she can have it all, and reality is soon going to come crashing down.

Bad advice from Dear Abby

2005-09-07T22:45:00.000-07:00

Dear Abby gives bad advice. Today's letter says:

DEAR ABBY: My husband, "Justin," and I have been together 12 years, married for five. We get along well, except for one thing, his so-called "jokes."

Rather than coming out and saying I've done something that bothers him, Justin will make a sarcastic comment, then insist he's "just kidding." If I forget to turn off a light, he'll say something like, "So, you're trying to make sure the electric company doesn't go out of business -- right?" ...

How can I get through to him that what he's doing isn't "joking"; it's avoiding accountability for his comments? -- NOT AMUSED IN VERMONT

If that is her biggest complaint, then they have a great marriage. I would tell her to be grateful for what she has. Dear Abby says that he has an incurable passive aggression condition, and recommends counseling.

Another letter from a 13-year-old boy complains about her mother's boyfriend. The boy doesn't even live with his mother, but he says:

I need help to get her to leave this guy because mental abuse leaves a scar on your life that causes you to hate and fear others.

I would tell the kid to mind his own business. Someone is putting meddlesome ideas in his head. Dear Abby suggests calling a domestic violence hotline.

Livestock will face certain death

2005-08-29T10:04:00.000-07:00

Here is an urgent message:

URGENT - WEATHER MESSAGE
NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE NEW ORLEANS LA
619 AM CDT MON AUG 29 2005

EXTREMELY DANGEROUS HURRICANE KATRINA MOVING ACROSS LOWER PLAQUEMINES PARISH

DEVASTATING DAMAGE EXPECTED

THE MAJORITY OF INDUSTRIAL BUILDINGS WILL BECOME NON FUNCTIONAL. PARTIAL TO COMPLETE WALL AND ROOF FAILURE IS EXPECTED. ALL WOOD FRAMED LOW RISING APARTMENT BUILDINGS WILL BE DESTROYED. CONCRETE BLOCK LOW RISE APARTMENTS WILL SUSTAIN MAJOR DAMAGE...INCLUDING SOME WALL AND ROOF FAILURE.

HIGH RISE OFFICE AND APARTMENT BUILDINGS WILL SWAY DANGEROUSLY...A FEW POSSIBLY TO THE POINT OF TOTAL COLLAPSE. MANY WINDOWS WILL BLOW OUT.

AIRBORNE DEBRIS WILL BE WIDESPREAD...AND MAY INCLUDE HEAVY ITEMS SUCH AS HOUSEHOLD APPLIANCES AND EVEN LIGHT VEHICLES. SPORT UTILITY VEHICLES AND LIGHT TRUCKS WILL BE MOVED. THE BLOWN DEBRIS WILL CREATE ADDITIONAL DESTRUCTION. PERSONS...PETS...AND LIVESTOCK EXPOSED TO THE WINDS WILL FACE CERTAIN DEATH IF STRUCK.

POWER OUTAGES WILL LAST FOR WEEKS...AS MOST POWER POLES WILL BE DOWN AND TRANSFORMERS DESTROYED. WATER SHORTAGES WILL MAKE HUMAN SUFFERING INCREDIBLE BY MODERN STANDARDS.

THE VAST MAJORITY OF NATIVE TREES WILL BE SNAPPED OR UPROOTED. ONLY THE HEARTIEST WILL REMAIN STANDING...BUT BE TOTALLY DEFOLIATED.

Wow! This is by far the scariest government message I have ever seen.

Personals jargon

2005-08-25T15:28:00.000-07:00

I've been reading some personal ads, and learning the jargon. They use funny terms like chemistry and drama. Here is what I have decoded so far.

Curvy is one of many euphemisms for a fat woman. Another is BBW. I am not sure what BBW stands for, but I think it is Big B. Woman where the 2nd B stands for some body part. People usually conceal their negative factors, but many woman find a way to disclose that they are overweight. Sometimes they'll give a weight or a dress size.

420 friendly means a marijuana smoker who wants to date another smoker.

LTR means Long Term Relationship. Usually it means marriage, but people are reluctant to mention marriage.

NSA means No Strings Attached. This means a casual encounter, the opposite of an LTR.

Chemistry means sexual excitement. Some women highly value the sexual part of the relationship, and some don't. The ones that do usually put the word "chemistry" somewhere in the ad.

Drama refers to stories about personal problems. Some people want to hear them, and some don't. A woman who commonly blows situations out of proportion might be called a "drama queen".

Baggage means leftover problems from past relationships.

There are a couple of terms that I haven't figured out yet. Some women say "no games", and yet they seem to want to play games as much as everyone else. I guess they prefer some types of games over some other types, but I'm not sure what.

Another odd phrase is "partner in crime". I thought that maybe it means that they do illegal drugs or like wild adventures or something like that, but I cannot seem to get a straight answer from anyone.

The mad cow indicator

2005-08-22T21:53:00.000-07:00

I went on 2 dates with this woman who was suspicious of me because I said I was politically conservative. I didn't think anything of her suspicions because I live in a left-wing town where most people are suspicious of conservatives. (I also exchanged some emails and phone calls, but that's all.)

It turns out that she had a previous boyfriend who was conservative, and she was annoyed by his poor performance in bed and his lack of concern for mad cow disease. So when I said that I didn't worry about mad cow disease, it triggered alarm bells, and she decided that I'd probably be lousy in bed!

Hmmm. I'll have to get used to dating again.

Google Earth

2005-08-04T15:46:00.000-07:00

The new Google Earth service is amazing. I live in the woods, with nearby ridges, gulches, lakes, meadows, quarries, and other features that are unknown to people living just two miles away. If you have a fast computer and an interest in geography, get it immediately. It is free and it's cool.

Optical illusions

2005-07-31T14:07:00.000-07:00

The optical illusions on this page are amazing. They prove that our color perception depends on context.

There are more illusions here.

Mind reading

2005-07-30T23:38:00.000-07:00

I keep running into people who seem to think that they have mind reading capabilities. They will confidently state what other people must be thinking, based on the skimpiest of evidence.

I am the sort of man who is not hard to read. I say what I mean and I mean what I say. Nevertheless, I sometimes hear people try to tell me that I am thinking something completely different.

People seem to do this mind reading without even realizing that they are doing it. And they don't seem affected by the contrary evidence.

Audio greeting

2005-07-23T21:51:00.000-07:00

One-legged sea gull

2005-07-23T19:06:00.000-07:00

On a recent trip to the local wharf, I spotted this one-legged sea gull.

Computer programmers are geeks

2005-07-22T09:06:00.000-07:00

Jay Leno just said:

Microsoft's Bill Gates says it's puzzling to him why more kids don't want to become computer programmers. I don't know -- I think maybe it is because at some point in their life they'd actually want to have a girlfriend!

He's got a point. I have a hard time getting a date when I say that I am a computer programmer. We have a bad image, I guess.

Hot in Las Vegas

2005-07-21T15:34:00.000-07:00

I went to Las Vegas last weekend. Not for the gambling or the 120 degree weather, but for a meeting of Doctors for Disaster Preparedness. They have all sorts of interesting views. Curiously, they think that global warming will not be a disaster.

The highlight of the trip was flying in an indoor wind tunnel. It simulates free-fall sky-diving by blowing a lot of air straight up in a cylindrical room. I highly recommend it, but I suggest that you go during a cooler season.

Ankle xray

2005-07-11T18:19:00.000-07:00

I just got my cast off my leg. Here are a couple of xrays of my broken fibula, with a steel plate holding it in proper position.

Cholesterol test

2005-07-08T23:37:00.000-07:00

I enjoy eating a lot of dairy and other high cholesterol foods, and occasionally someone gives me a lecture on how I am ruining my heart. I just had a medical test, and I have a total cholesterol of 161 and an HDL (good cholesterol) of 58, for a ratio of 2.8 to 1.

The optimum ratio is 3.5:1, and medical action is often recommended if the ratio goes above about 6:1.

As far as I know, there is absolutely no medical reason for anyone with a ratio below 4:1 or so to pay any attention to dietary cholesterol at all. A change in dietary cholesterol is unlikely to even have any effect on blood cholesterol.

My blood pressure was measured at 100 over 78. This is low, so there is no known harm to eating excessive table salt and some of the other things people worry about.

Mecca for lesbians and whiners

2005-07-06T22:54:00.000-07:00

The Si Valley paper says:

In Santa Cruz, many single women have a problem with the single men. Well, three problems, actually: Too many young college students. Too many surfer dudes and starving artists. And too many men who, well, aren't interested in women. ...

``Women around the world complain about the lack of datable men, but nowhere do they whine more than in San Francisco and in Santa Cruz,'' said Gosse, a former Catholic school teacher who's been in the dating industry for 27 years. ``In San Francisco, women say, the men are either married, gay or dead. In Santa Cruz, they're either young and still in college, gay or too poor.'' ...

``I hate to say this, but a lot of men in Santa Cruz lack a work ethic,'' said Margie Kudrav, a former Santa Clara Valley resident who moved to Santa Cruz County 12 years ago. ``It's a different world than San Jose. . . . I haven't dated in four years, but I never stop trying.'' ...

``It's the women who are gay,'' said Boudreau, referring to Santa Cruz's national reputation as a lesbian mecca.

The article describes a failure in an attempt to bring out-of-town men to meet the local Santa Cruz women. The explanation seems obvious -- Santa Cruz women have a reputation for being whiners and lesbians.

Disabled parking

2005-07-05T19:46:00.000-07:00

I have a broken leg, and I have to get around on crutches. I got a temporary disable person parking placard from the California DMV so I can park in blue spaces.

I didn't realize what a privilege the placard is. Not only do I get to park in blue (handicapped) spaces, I can park indefinitely in the 20-minute green spaces and I don't have to put money in a parking meter! Furthermore, at gasoline stations that have full-service and self-service pumps, I am entitled to full-service gasoline at the self-service rates.

I realize that I am a lot more disabled than most of the people use these placards, but I still feel a little guilty taking advantage of the rules. (Some people really need the blue spaces, but they are a small minority of the placard users.)

Within my own reality

2005-07-04T09:28:00.000-07:00

I just talked to a women who said, "I am conservative within my own reality".

I was asking her out on a date. She wanted to tell me how liberal she is, and how she tolerates homosexuals, dope-smokers, interracial dating, etc, but she didn't want to imply that she does any of those things herself.

I've heard of people who call themselves bisexual just to show how liberal and broadminded they are. They would never have a homosexual relationship, but they don't want to be accused of being homophobic either.

A new study claims that there is no such thing as bisexuality.

"To claim on the basis of this study that there's no such thing as male bisexuality is overstepping, it seems to me," said Dr. Gilbert Herdt, director of the National Sexuality Resource Center in San Francisco. "It may be that there is a lot less true male bisexuality than we think, but if that's true then why in the world are there so many movies, novels and TV shows that have this as a theme - is it collective fantasy, merely a projection? I don't think so."

Whatever sexual orientation means, don't believe that movie characters are representative.

Personal blog

2005-06-27T00:02:00.000-07:00

This is a personal blog. I am a mathematician, and a divorced father of two kids. I think that I'll keep it anonymous, just to protect the identities of my kids. You can send me email if you want to contact me.

I live in the woods near a quiet little California beach town. It is beautiful and the weather is ideal. Last night I watched the sunset so I could see Venus, Mercury, and Saturn together afterwards. They were unusually close in the sky.

First post

2005-06-16T23:41:00.000-07:00

This is a test message.